top of page
Writer's pictureTom Foxley

Why Personal Growth Fails Without Biological, Psychological and Neurological Support: How Character Makes Success Guaranteed

Updated: Oct 11

Glass ceilings, upper limit problems, reaching your full potential… it all means the same thing: “I’m stuck where I am and I want to move beyond it.


So you try to change. You try willpower. You jump on a meditation app. You journal for a bit. You listen to podcasts and read books. What usually happens at this point is you make a small change, but then revert back to normal a few months later.


Frustrating isn’t it? 


I’m going to show you exactly why that happens, and what you need to do about it.


If you're ready to finally become the person you're supposed to be, check out the Adventurepreneur Course Bundle. In these 3 courses, you'll set up your nervous system to thrive under challenge, banish the stories that hold you back, and develop your character into your ideal self.


Also, I’ll show you why some people can seemingly transform themselves with just one tool, and others take far longer to find what works for them.



Why Personal Growth Stalls: Unlocking the Three Critical Zones of Change



Becoming who you’re meant to be happens at three distinct levels; the state of our nervous system, the stories we believe, and the philosophy we act out.


People run into difficulties in creating change because they don’t know which level is holding them back.


Most people approach the problem in completely the reverse order - trying psychological keys in biological locks. If your nervous system is completely dysregulated, no amount of talk therapy is going to work.


If you believe you will be abandoning your roots, or that you’re fundamentally flawed, then becoming a Stoic is pissing into the wind.


Change happens physiologically, psychologically, and then philosophically. A true personal growth program addresses each of these three zones of growth. Each one of these zones of growth represents a distinct evolutionary step in the brain, as will become clearer throughout this article. We need to speak to the reptilian brain before we solve our childhood trauma. We need to banish our stories before we decide Marcus Aurelius is the one to model.


With that being said, there is a conversation happening between these levels constantly. Think of it like this: understanding philosophical concepts like ‘control the controllables’ may soften your story, and that in turn may make your physiological state less threatened.


What I'm saying is this: start with the body, then address your stories, then grow intentionally. This is the method I’ve successfully used with 1000+ freedom seekers.


Why Nervous System Regulation is Key to Breaking Through Limitations


The first zone of change is that of the brainstem and the autonomic nervous system. The autonomic nervous system regulates involuntary bodily functions like heart rate, digestion, and breathing, ensuring our body responds appropriately to stress and relaxation without conscious effort.


When our ancestors were little more than a cluster of cells, they developed a nervous system. This was so they could more efficiently perform the 4 F’s, fight, feed, flee, and… mate. 


At a very real level, that is what our nervous system still prioritises - fuel, safety, and procreation. This level is the evolutionarily oldest part of you, and when shit hits the fan, it will take over.


So if it senses threat, it hijacks the rest of your organism, and no amount of logic will take over (sorry Stoics).


For you, a freedom seeker wanting growth, this means you have three states you could be operating in. If everything is well regulated with the nervous system you’re in your social engagement mode. This is highly creative and exploratory. Basically, the nervous system feels safe and is willing to take a risk.


If it perceives threat however, you will try to fight or flee. Your sympathetic nervous system will become dominant. This means you’ll get upregulated. You will become agitated, stressed, and want to get out of there. On a day to day level, this looks like mindless hustle and grind or snappiness and arguments. It feels like tension.


If this level doesn’t solve the issue, you will hit the third level of nervous system threat perception, and like a mouse, you will play dead. You will shut down. You will completely retreat from challenge. You will feel apathy and dread and heavy fatigue.


To thrive as a freedom seeker, you must have a nervous system that positively approaches challenge. Not fighting it, not fleeing it, and certainly not playing dead. To do that we must teach the nervous system it is safe by pressing physiological levers.


Breathwork, cold and heat exposure, Non-Sleep Deep Rest (Yoga Nidra), sleep hygiene, caffeine regulation, alcohol limitation, natural light exposure, and meditation, to name just a few tools I use with my clients.


In the Calm Course, I teach you exactly how to master your nervous system & banish unhelpful anxiety, fear, stress and overwhelm. Click here to learn more.


Once your nervous system is well-regulated and your body feels safe, the next step is to address the deeper layers of your mind—the stories and emotions stored within the limbic brain.


Overcoming Mental Barriers: The Power of the Limbic Brain in Personal Growth

The second zone of change is the limbic brain. This is the world of psychology. Think of Freud, Jung, and Adler, and the depth psychologists as a whole. This is the world of stories, emotions,  beliefs, and trauma.


This part of our brain is phylogenetically newer - a nerdy term meaning it evolved later on. This means it’s pretty much subservient to the brain stem. But, it’s still highly powerful. Think about those times you’ve been enraptured by love, fear, anger, ennui, or depression. When the emotions are active, the rational mind cannot make headway until they’ve been fully felt, all the way through.



We learn our stories from 4 sources, each of which starts with an E. 


Evolution - what saved our ancestors bacon will be deeply embedded in your stories like your negativity bias. 


Education - what you were explicitly told. “You will amount to nothing,” for example. 


Experience - so your previous wins and losses. You don’t want to get burnt by the same poor choices twice. 


Finally, Environment - the most powerful of the belief generators. Your environment is what you implicitly learn. Nothing is more powerful than a mother’s quiet disapproval if you outshine your younger sister.


You change the stories you believe through journaling, win counting, story work, counselling, talk therapy and more besides.


Over the past decade of work with high performing freedom seekers, I've developed a 6 week process that will banish your limiting stories. I've put them all in the Clarity Course which is the exact process to clarity of vision, action, and character.


With your emotional and psychological narratives understood and reshaped, you're now prepared to engage the rational mind—the cortex—where intentional growth and philosophical exploration can truly flourish


Building a Life of Purpose: The Role of Philosophical Growth in Achieving Your Goals

The final level of growth is the most rational of all. It involves the cortex. The cortex is the outside of your brain, essentially. It's the newest phylogenetically. It’s rational. And it’s weaker than the other two zones of growth. 


“Be grateful” means sweet FA if your nervous system is convinced it’s about to die. “Practise virtue” is terrible advice to the limbic brain’s story of total ineptitude.


This level of growth is where so many start. It’s the outer layer of the onion. It’s less uncomfortable to look at how you plan your days, rather than explore the fear of ridicule that makes you play small. 


As such, you’ll only get surface level wins here, unless you have done deep work in the other two zones first. Then, the cortex can be utilised to create wonderful growth for you and your loved ones. 


If your body believes you're safe, and your story is one of meaning, the rational mind will create the freedom you seek.



So this is the point where you can dive into Nietzsche. You can read all the Ryan Holiday you want. You can nerd out on Peterson. You can read the Tao te Ching or Bhagavad Gita..and it will do you a huge amount of benefit.


But it’s all just mental masturbation if you haven’t built a foundation of deep growth.


If you are ready to shortcut the learning process and know what you need to know to rapidly become who you're meant to be, the Character Course is for you.


Summary


  1. There are 3 zones of growth you must work on

  2. Work through the 3 zones sequentially

  3. The brainstem is the most fundamental

  4. The limbic systems stores your stories

  5. The rational brain is last on the list



If you want to get absolute clarity of mind, in 6-8 weeks of learning and practical application, check out the Adventurepreneur Clarity Course. Here’s the course to banish your stories, get clear on what you want from life, and start getting it.


If you want to generate a deep, purposeful stillness, the Adventurepreneur Calm Course is for you. In this course, I’ll show you exactly how to regulate your nervous system to create a solid foundation for rapid growth.


And if you want to truly start becoming who you’re meant to be, it’s the Adventurepreneur Character Course. This course is all about closing the gap on the image of you, you hold in your mind.


Or, you can grab the Bundle, and get all 3 for the price of 2.

3,532 views0 comments

Comments


bottom of page